This past Valentine’s Day I was afraid I’d have a really bad day missing my husband. It was my second Valentine’s Day since he passed, and the first one, after sharing fifty-four others, was very hard. While I was at the grocery store the day before, I saw all the Valentine bouquets on display and spotted the red roses he would get me. I then saw pink tulips which I love. I paused to think about maybe getting them, but decided why waste the money. However, as I walked away, I heard a song start playing over the sound system… Tina Turner’s “Simply the Best”, my husband’s famous, comedic self-reference. I had to laugh how “coincidental” the timing seemed, like a sign. Whether it was or not, I bought the tulips for me…some self love.
I then decided that I needed to fill the next day with a happy plans to distract myself from that ever present underlying sadness of missing him and our shared love. What I discovered was all the love that came to me that next day, and in so many forms. I felt so blessed. I received some very special cards with thoughtful notes from very kind friends. The phone calls and emails with messages of happy, loving wishes came throughout the day. Several grandchildren texted me their little love notes. My out-of-state daughter sent me a surprise box of gourmet chocolate-covered strawberries. For dinner, I was invited over to my local daughter’s home who made everyone their favorite food including Beef Wellington. That evening we shared stories and laughter, and I felt so loved and connected. And when I went to bed, I mentally wished my husband a Happy Valentine’s Day telling him how much I loved him. At that moment, my cell phone made a notification ding, but there were no notifications. It felt like he said, “Right back atcha!” I felt his presence, and it made my day!
What a difference my Valentine’s Day was this year compared to last. It all started with a simple decision to be happy, and then I was open to see the all the love surrounding me. When you look for signs of love, it’s amazing how much is out there.
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