TALES FROM THE BOBBI LAMA

Last week I met with a group of seniors and we discussed how important it was for all of us to feel human connection and how healthy it feels. This morning, I saw the Artemis II crew in a triumphant hug on Facebook! It looked so warm, celebratory, and bonding. And this afternoon, I welcomed a former student to my home (who I hadn’t seen in over 30 years), and we hugged over and over feeling so conneccted after all this time. I got to thinking about the importance of that human connection in general. Most people are totally unaware of the power of human contact for human wellness – both physical and mental. Just a human touch of kindness (a pat on the back, a held hand, a hand on your arm) sends a message to the brain from our tactile system which is highly differentiated to discern types of touch. The skin itself is a giant sensory organ filled with nerve endings (like the C-tactile fibers). Even before birth, the first sense we develop will act as our most important survival system in this world, regulating breathing, temperature and the heart. Stories about babies neglected in orphanages dying from lack of contact are not new. In fact all humans are wired to respond to touch as one of safety and connection, or one of danger.

The sense of touch can alarm your central nervous system if the touch is perceived as a threat, sending it into fight or flight mode. On the other hand, when the touch is one of safety, the body can drop back into the parasympathetic nervous system’s “rest and digest” mode. When that happens, there’s a boost of oxytocin increasing trust and bonding, not to mention the physical benefits to the immune system, and digestive system, etc. Studies of the power of a sustained safe hug have shown that (depending on the length of the hug) it can reduce activity on the brain’s pain and threat center because of the significant response to the nervous system.

With that in mind… I hug. I make sure it’s okay first of course, because some people don’t care for that closeness for many different reasons (overly sensitive to contact, worried how it could be interpreted, or the spread of germs, etc.). But between me and my friends or family, I welcome it. Ever since my husband passed, I’ve felt the short supply. My arms are open in a welcoming invitation whenever appropriate, and it does feel good. It’s primal. It tells the body that we’re okay.